Friday, March 7, 2008

Seeing GREEN!!

I think I've posted about this before on here, when Trevor is in pre-k they have a behavioral chart for all the kids. It has all their names on it and a pocket under each name with three cards in it... a red one, a yellow one, and a green one. They try to encourage good behavior and keeping the cards all on GREEN. So green means that you had a fantastic day... you made all good choices and were a model student. Yellow means that you made some not-so-great choices with your behavior, so you had little bit of a rough day but not too bad. And when on yellow you can make it back to green by having good behavior and making better choices. And then there is red. Red cards are for when you are having a really tough day, and you can't seem to make many good choices. :(

Last year Trevor went to pre-k also, and it was with the same pre-school, he went for a few hours every day, well we didn't always send him, just because he was little, it would have been too much, but he did great there. He loved it and made things and learned things and was GREAT with the other kids and made good choices all the time. :) In his class last year they had happy or sad faces. Happy if you were having a GREAT and happy day and sad face if you weren't have the best day and if you were feeling a little sad or making other people in the class sad with your behavior. Trevor only had a sad face a few times. He did really great. Things were going well, so I never thought this year there would be a big difference in his behavior at pre-school. He started off doing great. He started off being the one of the few that didn't cry and have a fit and knew what to expect with the play stations and how they worked and all that... he was an old pro. Most of the other children in his class hadn't ever been in a pre-school environment.

But, then one day it started to go down hill with the green cards and every day almost he was having red. I would talk to him about it, his dad would talk to him about it... sometimes he would loose other things at home for his behavior in school. I think mostly we were so concerned about it was because we knew he could behave much better than he was and that he had done so well last year, we weren't sure what was going on this year. Then we decided we were just beating ourselves and mostly we were being way too tough on Trevor about it. Yes behaving in school and good behavior in general is very important, but how many times should an almost 4 year old be getting in trouble for the same thing? We were beating a dead horse. It was too much. He didn't make good choices in school, and so he was put on a red card. What more needed to be done?? Nothing. We were taking it too far. And honestly what he was doing in school wasn't anything horrible or really anything that any other almost four year old wouldn't be doing also. As a matter of fact what he was "getting in trouble" for was doing what the other kids were doing. He was running around, and they were all chasing one another and they were making noises when they were supposed to be quiet and they were fooling around and "horsing around" with each other. They were being kids. It wasn't bad. They were just learning which behavior was acceptable and which was not. I was over reacting and over doing it with the behavior "issue" at school. There wasn't one. We gave up caring. If he had a green day, GREAT. If he had a yellow day well that was okay too. And, if he had a red day, we would sometimes ask him what had happened and that would pretty much be the extent of it. Oh well he had a red day, life was still going on and he was still the same perfect little guy to us, he just had an off day. We took it all with a grain of salt. We didn't over analyze it, we didn't over parent it and we didn't talk more about it after it was said.

But, low and behold Trevor figured it all out... he figured out that he can have a great day and still have fun and be praised left and right for his good choices. He has been having green days forever now. Am I proud of him. You bet your bottom dollar I am. But, the truth of the matter is that I'm proud of Trevor no matter what color day he has at school. I'm always going to be proud of him. He is a smart boy, he is funny, caring, loving, sharing, entertaining, joyful, energetic, outgoing, shy, intelligent, giving, handsome, hugging, kissing, story telling, playful and a good son, brother, grandson, nephew, friend and student. He is an EXCELLENT little boy! I love him so much! :) And I did feel this way when he was on red in school all the time too. I will ALWAYS feel this way about him. He is my boy!

So today he is off to school again, he only stayed home on Wednesday this week so it was an almost full week of school. He seems to liking school okay. He still asks me if he can stay home. Like this morning he asked me if he could please stay home with me and the girls. I told him he should go b/c today was Friday, the last day of school for the week. He then said okay and was willing to go. I hope he likes kindergarten next year. This year it was hard for me to try to make him go every day of the week. I wanted him to be home with me as much as he wanted to stay home, maybe even more. But next year, although I'll still want him around, we won't have that choice. He will be off to school, full time. Or we will have to answer to others about his where abouts and I'm almost sure that the school will not care that we just are used to being together every day and really miss each other. We'll have to work on getting adjusted to it. Thank goodness we have the entire summer to work up to go kindergarten. I have a lot of plans for our family this summer. :)

So anyway... that is the update on Trevor. He was going to school today to earn the BIG huge sticker he saw on the sticker sheet while he is teacher was giving out good behavior stickers. :) I'm sure he will be excellent today just like he has been. :)

Last night we went to Chuck E. Cheese with the kids because last time we were there it was too crowded, well it got too crowded minutes after we were there so we ate and left. We had left over tokens, so it didn't cost us anything which was kind of nice. We all had a great time. I have some pictures to post a little later in the day of our trip there. It was fun. We also went out to eat and then we ran into Sam's Club. I'm not sure about anyone else, but when I'm in there I could just shop for days. I want everything. But, then again I'm also the one who likes to have/needs to have 8 boxes of pasta and 4 huge jars of sauce and stock of EVERYTHING possible. :) It's my comfort. Not sure why. We have never run out of food and not gone shopping again. As a matter of fact, we have never had bare cabinets or even a bare shelf. lol Oh well, maybe it part OCD or something. But after Sam's Club we took our sleepy little behinds home and the kids too. :) lol

I'll try to post some pictures later during nap time from Chuck E. Cheese. I think I got some good ones. I didn't even go through them to see what I got. The pictures are of my kids so no doubt they are cute!! :)


Lil Mouse said...

isnt it funny about having a full pantry? it sure makes you feel good!

Stephanie said...

Mine is rarely full, we usually go everyday to the store. That will stop soon though, I am not taking all 4 girls to the store every day.

That's great Trevor learned on his own that Green days are "better" than red. I worried myself sick about Aidan and kindergarten even though she liked/did well in pre-k. I am glad we opted for the teacher she has, her teacher is a family friend. I know if Aidan had a bad Kindergarten expierience she would hate school like I did.

Allie Bear said...

Nicholas was like that too, about getting on red, we did the same thing you did. We went overboard trying to discipline him for bad behavior but then we changed our strategy, just like you did we went overboard for good behavior. Positive reinforcment works so much better. Seems like we have a lot in commmon, not just both having amazing sons either.

frangela said...

I loved hearing Trevor's school stories! I can only imagine how it will break my heart when it's time for my 16 month old to start kindergarden! It brings tears to my eyes already! Sappy, I know!

Can't wait to see the cute pics!

Crystal said...

LOL! Seeing as how i've had both kids go through all this, i'll tell you like i've told BFF. Her son is 6 and in kindergarten. Kids, especially boys will ALWAYS horse play, play fight, whatever, until around the age of 8 or even 9 and sometimes even older than that. Using their imaginations as they do, it just can't be helped. They start roll playing and just get into it with all the noises and body parts flying and just can't help themselves.

Boys will be boys and all of that. BFF is ALWAYS getting notes and phone calls from her son's teacher and the majority of it is because HE'S YOUNG! The attention span is nill and he just don't wanna pay attention!LOL! Sometimes I think the teachers could ease up a bit. Young kids aren't always going to sit still, pay attention and listen. Some, like my son, was looking for getting attention. He wanted the attention of his dad that wasn't seeing him. He was always in the principal's office and all that. Instead of getting frustrated and not knowing what to do, I eased up and acted like it wasn't a big deal. Things calmed way down after that. Plus, all that he was doing was not in a mean way. I don't tolerate my kids being out right mean to anyone but that wasn't it.

Now, with William being 8 and having his dad out of his life YET AGAIN, his mentality is different than what it was when he was younger. Plus, i'm all about talking to my kids about feelings, emotions, and all that goes with it. I let them know that it's alright to express yourself but just do it in a health way. Think first before acting on it. If you THINK you'll get in trouble try another way. Of coarse, we had MANY conversations before it finally sunk in to their heads.

Everything your son is going through IS NORMAL! He's a kid and a boy to boot. A few years from now you'll look back and think that this was so simple compared to whats to come with them getting older. Schools are just getting TOO strict in some areas. Glad to know yours is doing just fine now;o)

Jill Leigh said...

I miss you and your adorable muchkins!!! I wanna see you guys this weekend. What are you doing Sat night??? Hopefully hanging out with us lol!!! Call me later if you get a chance so we can catch up, and I will try and call you again too. I love you so so so so so so so so so so so so so so so much!! Oh yea, and I STILLLL have yours and the kids Valentine's Day presents!! I am the worst ever. Hope the kids remember me hahaha. It has been that long too. Oh well, I wanna see you and them so bad so CALL ME BITCH!!!

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