Where Am I?

I've been trying to get to the computer for days now. I have had a lot on my mind and a lot I wanted to blog about.

Things have just been wild here lately. But in a good way. We had a great time with the kids and seeing family for Christmas Eve and Christmas, it was very nice. I wish we got to see some more family members, but it just didn't work out for us that way this year. But hopefully we will make some great plans for next year. Maybe even hosting Christmas Eve or Christmas day dinner... but I'm not sure. I'd like to do it because then I get to see everyone and they come to me, but I'm not sure I could handle it all. I also would like to take that work off of my mom's shoulders. We'll see... we have about 362 days to think about it and plan it.

For now, one of my focus' is getting the house cleaned up and done for our New Years Eve party. I'm looking forward to having a good time with friends and family, but I kind of wish it was over with already. I'm not entirely sure why I'm feeling this way. I guess because I know it will be a lot of work to have everything ready for it. We are getting really down to the wire, and there is a lot more we want to do before hosting the party. But since it is family and friends coming I'm sure they won't judge any of it. AND we have only been living here for two months and redoing more than half the house.

Speaking of the house, I have some pictures to post of our house... it is a little bit late, since some of these things we did when we first moved in, but you know how the saying goes... better late than never. lol :P

I'm determined to make 2009 a much better year. I want to make it better for my children, my husband, my parents, my family, my friends and for myself. I want to work really hard to make this year count. I want to laugh a LOT, smile often, make awesome memories with the ones I love. I want to forgive and forget quickly and learn from mistakes instead of carrying them around with me to think about constantly and harp about. I want to think wonderful thoughts, and have great daydreams and not worry and stress about things that aren't worth my time or thought process. I want to be more responsible for the things I can take responsibility for and be carefree with the things that I have NO control over... and let it be in fates hands.

I want to enjoy every single day of 2009. I want to call old friends and get together. I want to catch up and have fun conversations and take pictures. I want to go on walks with my kids and let them run and scream and be little. I want to go to the lake every day it is nice. I want to run through the hose and laugh till it hurts. I want to hug and kiss my children every single day and realize just how truly blessed I am. I want to have time with my parents and go to dinner with them and talk and enjoy them. I want to hang out with my brothers and their families. I want to meet some of my blogging friends IRL. I want to learn to let go and move on. I want to know that there are going to be bad days, but that is all they are... just a bad day... and that tomorrow will be better. I want to be able to cry, get it out, wipe the tears away and know that I'll be okay. I want to be a better mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend... PERSON. And most of all... I AM going to do all these things.

Some dreams are just that, dreams. Some dreams you can't ever touch. These are all touchable. These are within my reach and I'm going to grab tight and not let go till I reach my destination. This is going to be a GREAT year. I know it!!

~well I so wasn't expecting all that. I was just going to post a few things, some updates and rambling, but then that all just came out and well there you have it. I wasn't going to do a year end post because I have been having a lot on my mind lately and stressing to no end... but this just seems perfect. Unplanned and just right.

Here's to 2009!!