Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Sadness...

~What makes you reflect on your life? What makes you really sit back and examine all that you have and all that is of significant value to you. Not monetary value, but true life value. To me, the most valuable things in my life, aren't things at all. They are people. Those people are my children, my husband, my parents, my brothers, my in-laws (you all know the ones I mean) my nieces and nephews and my friends.
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~I always am wrapped up in every day life, and living it just to get by. Sure I love my life, my family and friends, but I don't always sit back and really take it all in.
I am wealthy because I have it all, I have a wonderful family. One that supports me and loves me for who I am. The take the good with the bad, the bitch with the mood swings. I'm blessed. I am in WONDERFUL health. I have no major illness and haven't ever had any either. I have never been hospitalized except when I had my children. I have my vision, my hearing and most of all my sense of humor. I am blessed.
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~I have three beautiful children, and I do mean beautiful. They are gorgeous inside and out. They are loving, affectionate, passionate, smart, caring, funny, sharing, giving, generous and just all around amazing and wonderful. None of them have ever been ill. Sure we have had some common things, like colds and stomach bugs, but that is pretty much it. Both girls have NEVER had ear infections... knock on wood, and Trevor only had the beginning stages of one when he was under one year old. They have never had one single problem in life. They are 100% perfect, in every sense of the word. They are energetic and they play and run and do everything together. They love one another. They are healthy and growing like flowers. I'm truly blessed.
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~I have a wonderful husband, whose head would swell at reading that, but I have to admit it is true. He is pretty darn wonderful. He puts up with me and my bitchiness and my truck driver mouth... and my mood swings and my nagging. He is good to me and our children. He works every day, very hard, to be able to support our family so I can stay home and raise our children. He helps me cook and clean... he even does dishes, laundry and vacuums. He is a great daddy to our children and just an all around good guy. I'm really lucky to have him in my life. I am blessed.
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~I have wonderful parents who, still, love and support me in everything I do in life. They love my family and do whatever they can to help us out in any way. They are the most caring, loving and generous people I have ever known in my life. They are that way to anyone they know, not just us. :) I am blessed.
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~I also happen to have the worlds greatest friends. You know the kind, the ones that are ALWAYS there for you, no matter what. The kind that offer a shoulder and an ear. That are always there to support you even if it is one of the stupidest things you have every in your entire life thought of doing... they tell ya that, but then are right there beside you helping you every step of the way. They want your dreams for you as much as you want them yourself and they try everything in their power to make that happen... as I'm typing this I realize this isn't just my friends that are this way... this is how my husband and my parents are too... I have this enormous, wonderful support team with me all the time, every second of every day... always there. Breathing the same air I breath and walking this same journey through life. Some of them are only 20 minutes away and some are an hour and 20 minutes away, but I still feel them right beside me all the time. Every. Single. Step. I'm never alone and I'm always loved. I AM truly blessed.
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~The things that always make me take a look at life like this... for what I really have and what my true treasures are... are when people pass away. It always brings me right back to reality and quickly too. It always gives me focus to see what I really have and that I need and want for nothing. Of course there are the monetary things... the house, the car, the dreams, but those things I can live without... those things haven't made me who I am, and they won't change who I'll be. They are simply that... things.
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~In the last few days, my camera took a crap, my fridge quit, my sugar glider died, my nephew's cat died, my friend, Jenn's cat died... and those are all set backs. The animals are truly sad and are going to be missed. But there is worse news. Much worse.
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~My landlord's, who aren't just ever day run of the mill kind of land lords, they are family friends, they are loving, caring, giving, generous people, they have been so good to Bryan and I and my family I can't even begin to tell you. They are good people. Very good people. Well on Sunday they found out that their 38 year old son died. He left behind his parents, his wife and two young daughters, his brother and sister and other nieces and nephews. This is horrible. I am just so upset about this. I'm so sad for the family and those two little girls.
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~Then today I talked to Alyssa, and I found out that her uncle, only 49 years old, died unexpectedly yesterday. I am so sad for her and her family. I can't imagine what they are all going through. I offer her any support and help she can use. I offer her my shoulder any time she needs to cry or vent or for anything. I send my condolences to her family. I'm in shock that this happened to her family.
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~Tonight I talked to my mom, and she said that my aunt had called to tell her that a man that has lived in our neighborhood, well longer than we have, passed away. An acquaintance/friend of my parents. I'm very upset.
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~This is a lot to deal with. To try to understand. Three people in three days. I'm afraid for tomorrow to come. I'm afraid to hear what it will bring. This is a horrible streak of bad luck, if you can even call it bad luck. I feel it way more than that. Worse than bad luck.
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~There are other things going on as well in our personal lives, Bryan's job is taking away a major perk of them having work vehicles to drive to and from work. Something that we really were grateful for and relied in immensely. We will now have to buy a car for him to drive to and from work and also figure out insurance money and gas money and all that, while we are hoping to be moving and fixing up an entire house, which we haven't heard any new news on. Still waiting on contracts! We live in NY and the owner lives in CO... he was supposed to email them to our realtor Monday, but she hasn't heard from them.
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~Anyway... this is all nothing. Thank goodness we have our health and one another. I just pray that tomorrow is a new fresh day!
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~I do have some good news, the lady that does my nails, her assistant, another Jennifer, had her baby girl on Monday... on Trevor's birthday. See God does delivery great miracles too!
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~Here is to tomorrow being a lot better!!
CHEERS!
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~PS please say a prayer for all the families that have experienced a loss this week, please keep them in your thoughts. thank you.

6 comments:

jenn said...

The beauty of the first part of this post brought tears to my eyes, and the second made my heart hurt. I know you already shared this with me, but it still so hard to read. I don't know these people, but they will be in my prayers.

I love you, girlie!

Annie said...

Many hugs to you. The fact that you can look past all the bad stuff and see the blessings really speaks to how wonderful your heart is.

(((hugs)))

DysFUNctional Mom said...

Things like that make me reflect on my life, too.
I'm sorry for all the sadness, but it's good that you can be thankful for your blessings.
xoxo

Crystal said...

Sometimes Jennifer we have to make ourselves take notice to the important things we forget about on a daily basis. You asked the question of what makes us reflect on our lives. Well, for me it's the past. I look at how hard a past i've had and I look in the mirror everyday and thank God that I have grown as much as I have. That I've learned to appreciate everyone and everything in and about my life. There will be days that you forget to do this but most days it will be so easy to look at the people that you care so deeply for and thank them for all they are and do to bring happiness into your life. With my relationship with Tim, I let him know everyday, whether it be that he makes me smile, that I appreciate him or how special he is to me. My children I let know every day how much I love them. I work with my parents and we're always together and make long lasting memories together. My best friends mom just died and I went to the funeral yesterday. I haven't seen her in 4 years but we talk on the email at least twice a week. We can appreciate everyday for the rest of our lives but until you don't have that special someone in your life any longer the weight of how much they mean to you doesn't really isn't known. Make sense? The magnitude of feelings isn't realized, so to speak. If that makes better sense...I think I just confused myself. Anyway, all you can do is try your best to love and care for everyone that you hold dear to your heart. (((HUGS)))

Momisodes said...

What a tragic turn of events. My heart breaks for all of these families. They will all be in my thoughts and prayers, as well as yours through these tough times.

*hugs*

This Guy said...

You are an amazingly beautiful writer! Your words have truly brought tears to my eyes tonight! You really do have an amazing family, and I think thats what life is all about, your hubby, and your kids are amazing! Good friends are always a must too!!

Death... Wow. What do you even say about it. It seems that your circle of friends and family have certainly had their fair share... When my mom died, I can't even begin to describe how I felt, and still feel. However, I am thankful tho for all the time that we've had together, yes, it ended too soon, but we'll see our loved ones whom have passed again.

You, your family and friends are in my prayers!
Blessings,
Bret xoxo BIG HUGS!

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